Thank you so much for writing a story for me! This is a placeholder for my real letter, which I promise to put up as soon as I return from my weekend away on Monday, the 16th of November. my real letter! I am back from away and have added extra details! This will stay at the top of my journal until the 24th of December for easy reference.

(For confused readers, this entry is for my anonymous fanfiction writer in the Yuletide Obscure Fandom Fiction Exchange Project.)

( My fandom requests and extra details below the cut )

Messages

I continue to wade through the middle of the most boring epic fantasy plot evar. I am but an ordinary girl, yet I have been chosen by the Gods to tackle a giant (and totally boring) quest. Yesterday my MacGuffin was a letter explaining that even when my insurance application goes through, Massachusetts will not pay for out of state medical bills. Having secured this magical item, I get to now send it off to Connecticut in the hopes that the Council of Sorcerous Healers there will agree to lower my fees. Julia and the Quest to Kill the Kidney Stone is totally bestseller material, no?

Shiny

Today, though, I diverged from the health!quest in order to tackle some very important seasonal shopping, and I found some pretty winning wrapping paper. Monstery alien things! They want to eat you! And guard your gifts!

Click on any photo to see larger versions on Flickr.

This week our guest is annathepiper, who seems like a lot of fun. In her interview, she gives us some tips about what to see and do in Seattle (where her urban fantasy novel, Faerie Blood is set), and talks about how online roleplaying helped her develop her writing skills.

The prompt today was "something you usually ignore". I chose this painting by Moss's grandmother (who died a few years ago), because even though I really like it, I tend to work while facing the opposite wall, so I often forget to look at it. I only got to meet Moss's grandmother once, but she was a very sweet woman. What I love about this painting is the warmth of the colors. It makes me happy, and I'm glad we have it to remember her by.


(Click through to see a larger version on Flickr if you so desire.)

The person I mentioned yesterday has about half the amount she needs in order not to be homeless a few hours from now. To sweeten the deal, samhenderson is offering copies of her novel to people who donate $10 or more, and alankria is offering card stories to people who donate $25 or more. info on both of those things here.

I'll throw in a mix CD for anyone who donates $15 or more. Just send me a copy of your PayPal confirmation (julia at juliarios dot com), and an indication of what sort of music you like. I really want Ju (and her mom and dog) to have a home! Please re-post this wherever you like. I will send mixes to anyone at all provided I have an address and a donation confirmation.

So this year, the December Photo Month organizer said there was no official photo for the 1st. Official photos start today with the theme of textures. I just received a wreath from my mother (now the house smells piney!), so that was the obvious place to look for textures. Click on any picture to see other sizes on Flickr.

Here's the wreath:


( Textures and video of La Mrowsera under the cut )

First, another person in desperate need of help. This one needs $2500 by 10pm tomorrow, Eastern US time, or she'll be homeless, along with her mom and her dog. The link has the full horror story and a PayPal button. alankria points out that if 250 people can spare $10, we can make this work. I'm all for making things work.

( Boring health update is boring )

In other news, I think I have an idea for a bestseller that will make us all rich. Are you ready for it?

The Kidney Stone Diet!*

I've lost 17 pounds in six weeks on this amazing new diet, and so can you! Now, back in the olden days, people would have to wait for ages for their bodies to naturally form kidney stones. It was a question of winning the genetic lottery. Who would be lucky enough to benefit from the life affirming wonders of extreme pain and appetite loss? Many would go their entire lives without knowing this joy. But now, we live in an advanced technological age, and anyone can get a kidney stone with a simple, slightly invasive procedure. Your Kidney Stone Technician with use a special probe to inject a stone into your kidney in a five minute long outpatient procedure, and the rest is history. Check out our testimonials!

"I was skeptical at first, but the Kidney Stone Diet really works. I've had five stones now, and I'm in constant pain. It's fantastic!"
KidneyStoneGirl95

"It hurt like f***, and I'm down ten pounds!"
Jane Smith

"I really feel like I'm in touch with my body now that I have no interest in food. Instead of salivating every time I see ice cream, I clutch my side and grimace. It's wonderful."
KSDietMelissa

How can this diet book possibly fail?

*Moss suggests the excellent alternate titles, Women with Kidney Stones Don't Get Fat, and YOU: With a Kidney Stone.

Several people have been generous enough to offer me financial assistance right now, but as yet, I don't need that (much though I do appreciate the offers). There are other people in the world who do need that sort of help right now, though, and this is one of them. Her husband is dying, and she needs help covering cremation costs. If you thought you could spare a few dollars for me, I'd be much happier if you sent them to her. Her PayPal e-mail address is johanna_mead@yahoo.com. Please remember to tell PayPal it's a gift so they don't charge her any fees.

I'm very tired today, and not really with it, but I just woke up enough to make a couple of moves in my Facebook Scrabble games, so I thought I should report here, too. I gather that some people worry about me when I don't post, and I don't want to perpetuate that.

Yesterday I called every urology department I could find, which was extremely tedious and stressful. Social anxiety around phoning people is no fun even when there isn't a big scary medical problem hanging over it all. When there is? Well, I half wonder if that's part of why I'm physically a mess today. Anyway, the answers I got were mostly not so hot. Lots of places with no openings for months, plus confirmation that the Children's Hospital doesn't treat adults (fair enough, but I still had to try). At the end of the day, I got a call back from the urology department at MGH (Mass General Hospitsl), though, and they said I should call the "kidney stone department" this morning at 9:00.

Other than the calls, yesterday and Sunday were pretty decent days. Fairly low pain, and I was tired, but functional. Sunday I cleaned the house some, and yesterday, my sister was kind enough to come and drive me to get the annual state inspection on the car. Both days without Vicodin, too, which was pretty exciting. Today, however, I woke at seven thirty in too much pain to do anything but swallow a pill and try to stay very still. I think I tried to play Facebook Scrabble, and couldn't concentrate enough through the pain to make any sense of the tiles.

At ten past nine, I called the nephrology department at MGH and got their answering service, who said they really should be there any minute. I think Moss brought me oatmeal around then, but I went back to sleep without eating it, and dreamt that I was on the phone with the nephrology department and couldn't hear anything they said. Woohoo anxiety dreams!

Around ten my mother called, awakening me from my desperate attempts to understand the dream!nephrology department's phone staff. I told her I had to go, and called back for real. This time I got a person who told me that I could have an appointment on the 7th of January (sooner than all the other places at least), and that I needed to call registration because the computer said I was uninsured. Also, I apparently need to get the cat scan disc from Manchester Memorial or else the MGH doctor won't see me.

I scrawled down the appointment time and fell back to sleep. This time I dreamed I was at MGH in the waiting area, and that MGH people were telling me I'd done something wrong, while on my cell phone, a woman named Atlanta was calling and saying things I couldn't understand, but that sounded like they involved me missing expensive bloodwork appointments I'd made earlier, and needing to pay double for them.

Moss woke me up around noon to say that he was going to work (he'd managed to work from home all morning), and then I slept for another half hour before waking up enough to play Facebook Scrabble and write this. I should probably call MGH and Manchester Memorial now, too, but I really don't want to. Sigh. I'm thinking I may ask Manchester Memorial if they can refer me to a local doctor with openings in the next week or two. I don't know if it will work, but they're only an hour and a half away, and I'd love to get this resolved as soon as possible. I don't think my Vicodin is going to last until the 7th of January, which means I'll have to go back to the ER anyway. Gah.

So that's how things stand right now. I'm sorry this is long and boring, but I really don't want to cause undue worry. I'm still alive. I'm basically okay. I think I need to go back to sleep now, though.

( Okay, first the health report for all the people who are dying to know about the state of my kidney. )

And now the Candy!

This year the Yuletide community decided to open up to an international candy exchange. I got to send candy to someone in Japan, and my candy provider sent me stuff from Australia! Yay! I had pretty much forgotten about it what with everything else, so getting the package today was very exciting indeed.


The contents of the package were all wrapped up individually! Ooh, presents! Plus a lovely note on Star Wars stationery and a sheet of cosmic stickers. My person is awesome!

( Unwrap the presents? )

So, in conclusion, my candy exchange person went above and beyond. Thank you, sailorcoruscant!

This week our guests are the co-authors of Publishers Weekly's speculative fiction blog, Genreveille, rosefox and sinboy. They gave a lot of good queer speculative fiction recommendations, and I particularly enjoyed their musings on tropes they love and hate. Here's the interview.

(It's big, it's scary, it happened at Thanksgiving ... It's not over yet)

Today I am thankful for:
*Just missing the 9:51 commuter rail in Port Chester
*The extremely kind hospital staff at Manchester Memorial Hospital in Manchester, Connecticut
*Opiates
*Beautiful weather and gorgeous scenery at daybreak
*Moss
*My family and friends
*Signs indicating the nearest hospital, which actually do their job
*Did I mention opiates?

( What I did over my Thanskgiving Vacation )

Ages ago (nearly a month now), I said I would try to unpack my responses to this post by mac_stone, but then November exploded all over the place (I was ill, my sister was moving, I had to travel, the list goes on), and I just wasn't up to making this post. Today, I'm going to try.

Like far too many other women of my acquaintance, I'm a survivor of sexual violence. I'm not going to go into any more detail on that right now, but I wanted to put it out there up front, so that you know where I'm coming from. Now, if you haven't read Mac's entry, this would be a good time to do that. Okay? Okay.

Mac can't imagine that any woman would draw and write this particular comic. I can.

When I first saw that comic on my friendslist (which acts as my catch-all rss reader), I thought it was funny, in part because it was true. I can think of several friends who have had that kind of thought, have told me about their frustrations in getting that one cute person to notice them, and I've sympathized. Now, as a rule, I don't talk to anyone in the wild unless I have to, but then I'm socially anxious and reserved. I moved to Boston for the comfortable level of expected social interaction with strangers (well, that and the weather, but still). But people vary, and I know others who love getting to know random strangers. And more than that, I know women who see the same people every day on their commute, and want to talk to them, or maybe even date them. It does happen.

As for the guy's side of it, I had the pleasure of meeting Randall Munroe a while ago, and he seemed like the sort of person who would think up a comic like that because he understands that it is absolutely necessary for men to think about how their approach might threaten a woman. And you know, I think at least some of them do. Not all of them, and not nearly enough of them, but some. My sister recently got a missed connection on Craigslist, for instance. A man had seen her in public, but didn't want to creepily hit on her then, so he put it out there on the internet in case she wanted to say hello. I don't think she did, because a lot of the stuff in Mac's post about women being wary of strange men is grounded in truth. She doesn't know who this guy is, and I don't think she wants to get into a situation where she'd a) be in danger, or b) have to do a lot of "please go away now" talking. I can totally understand both of those things. But you know what? Getting that missed connection was nice. It was non-threatening, and flattering. And I think the guy who wrote it knew that chatting her up when he first saw her would not necessarily be either of those things.

Now, having said all that, it's important to note that a lot of violence, sexual or otherwise, comes from people one already knows. I am keenly aware of this, and I'm cautious about who I trust. Maybe that's what makes me less concerned about strangers on trains than some other women seem to be. Or maybe it's that there are usually other people around in those situations. Put me into a subway car alone with a strange man, and I'll get very anxious if he pays me any attention. In a full car, I'll probably just be annoyed.

Now, back to my sister. She's cute, petite, and friendly, and she gets hit on all the time. In the last few weeks, on top of that missed connection, she's been asked out at least twice while she was on her way to work, and by two out of three apartment brokers (the third was a straight woman, in case you were wondering). In the past few weeks, I've been hit on by no one. I am, granted, not as conventionally attractive as my sister is, but what I think it really comes down to is that I tend to send "go away" signals. I read books, I listen to my ipod, I naturally adopt poses that serve to guard against contact rather than to welcome it.

My sister was obviously engaged in a non-contact-inviting activity when the missed connections guy saw her, but other times, she reads as open and approachable. And I don't know that it's bad that people ask her out. I think as long as they don't try to invade her space, and respect any signals she gives once they initiate contact, it's probably okay. And I think that's at the root of the XKCD strip. It's when people don't back off that things get really uncool.* This particularly happens with men a lot of the time, but is bad no matter which gender the initiator identifies as. Telling someone they have a cute netbook is one thing. Trying to force further conversation if the person ignores you or seems uncomfortable is another. But the thing is, most people really wouldn't bite someone's head off for a casual comment like that, and I think that's worth considering alongside the other stuff.

I was going to talk about earrings and Dan Savage and Disney Princesses, but I think this is enough for today. Maybe I'll come back to those things later. I welcome discussion in the comments, but please respect other commenters, okay? For a lot of us, this sort of thing is hard to talk about, and we really don't need people coming in and shouting at us when we get up the courage to say something.

*Like the time in France when a guy complimented me on the street late at night and got aggressive when I wouldn't acknowledge him. He eventually got right up in my face, and I pointed at my throat as if to say, "I have laryngitis! I can't possibly answer!" because I really, really didn't want him to know I was American. He thought I was mute, and then felt really awful and apologized copiously for having harassed a mute woman, which was good because it let me off the hook, but also, WTF? Why did he think it was okay to harass a woman as long as she wasn't mute? Seriously not cool.

Before I talk about this week's interview, I think it's important to note that today is the eleventh annual International Transgender Day of Remembrance. Although in my lifetime, I've seen a lot of progress for LGBTQI acceptance, the sad truth is that there's still hate out there. There are still hate crimes, and there are still violent deaths like Rita Hester's. Today is a day to reflect on that, to honor the dead, and to think about how we can prevent future violence. If you feel so inclined, there are remembrance events happening in Australia, Europe, and North America today, and throughout this weekend.

In less grim news, I've been doing this Spotlight thing for ten weeks now, which is pretty awesome. It feels like I just started yesterday. Today's subject, Chris Fletcher, was one of the very first people to join The Outer Alliance back in August, and (as you'll see below) he has some great insight on what drives people to become editors.

Most people who want to publish zines are basically out of their minds. It’s like some kind of chronic illness that can only be treated by publishing stuff. Fortunately, effective treatments are now within the easy reach of people who have computers and internet access.

Read the rest here.

This week's Spotlight is with another YA author. Lauren McLaughlin's books, Cycler and (Re)Cycler, are cracktasticly fast reads that really poke at gender stereotypes. If you haven't read them, I recommend them! Also, she was very fun to interview.

It was downright warm, bordering on hot today, which was weird, but not unpleasant. The light was gorgeous, too (Moss and I theorize that we get awesome afternoon light up here in exchange for early sunsets). Anyway, we went on a rambling walk, arriving home just as the sun had set. If you have some misguided notion that I wouldn't a) take pictures, and b) post them, then you clearly haven't been paying attention.


The bikepath all awash in golden afternoon light.

( follow the path to birds, leaves, water, and trees )

Tomorrow, maybe I will feel up to providing some non-picture content. Today, though, I think we should all just look at pretty things.

Went out and about tonight, and met some new people. Discovered several others who adore the Samuel Whittemore historical marker as much as I do, because, really now. How can one not?

Then ckd pointed out his favorite traffic sign in Cambridge. It may be my favorite now, too:



Also, Christina's has Mexican chocolate ice cream! This is very exciting, especially since Whole Foods stopped carrying the delicious Palapa Azul kind. Boston has so much wonderful ice cream. It's ridiculous (in the best possible way).

Outer Alliance Spotlight #8 is up. This week we're celebrating the LBTQ themed anniversary issue of Crossed Genres with the editors, Bart Leib and K.T. Holt. Check it out!

In sort of on topic news, it looks like Washington state passed Referendum 71, so same sex couples can have more rights (just, you know, not the right to call themselves legally married ... *sigh*). This is something, even if we lost ground in Maine. I really want to believe that Lauren McLaughlin (who is, incidentally next week's Spotlight subject) is right to be hopeful about the future of LGBTQI rights.

And finally, not exactly related, but while we're on the activism train: please go read Elizabeth Bear's post about the House Health Care for America Act, and if possible, contact your congressional representative to express your support. I know way too many uninsured people. This is not right. Everyone should be able to get health care whenever they need it. Why are we living in such technologically advanced times without that being a given?

The latest book in the altered book round robin exchange is titled Altered Verses, and is on the theme of poetry. It was started by my friend Stephen Rowe, who is an excellent poet (and even has a book of unaltered verses out). I very briefly considered composing something of my own to include in this book, but once I stopped to think a bit more, the correct course of action became very clear.


A teaser shot for the other altered book group members who don't want to be spoiled.

( O Mercury, patron of thieves... )

And, speaking of terrible writing, I really have most thoroughly waxed the cat at this point, and I must be off to get some work done now. I'll leave you with this image of Dinah Bell, performing her writing aid duties most admirably:



(To see other altered book spreads I've done, follow the love is not love which alters tag.)

Today is a day for sharing good things. Here are some of mine:

A lady bug landed on my sweater as I left the house today. I coaxed her onto my finger and then she flew up to sit on the rim of my glasses for a few seconds before flying off into a tree.

On the bikepath, I met a sleek, black cat. Her fur was velvet soft, and her eyes were the color of fallen oak leaves. She let me scratch her under the chin, and then left me in favor of chasing leaves.

I sat for an hour and watched the pond, leaves in the water, and ducks and geese. The sound of small splashes as water lapped stone.

Please tell me some of yours now, if you don't mind.